The term charisma (pl. charismata, adj. charismatic; from the Greek χάρισμα, meaning "favor given" or "gift of grace"): compelling attractiveness or charm that can inspire devotion in others.
You have to be independent because no one really likes you.
Some have bonds to you, ties that restrain, that cost them.
Some get used to you, and find that comfortable, but have to pay for that comfort with all the little things about you they can't stand about you. Better have money to get away when necessary.
True friendships and loves, on the contrary, add freedom, add new possibilities. They are not "bonds".
You can't see desire. Desire is the influence of the past on the present. It is what you've found to be good in the past and want again to have and are trying to get.
You can calculate the kind of thing you have desired, but not see desire itself.
The people with bonds to each other don't desire each other. They are future directed. They want to make money and obtain power. Money and power promise safety in the future. The future is guaranteed through other people, through giving them what they want. When afraid of failing in this action entirely dependent on predicting and manipulation the action of strangers, they fall back on the "bonds" of family and friends.
The bonds have been made either in childhood, without conscious choice. Or in adulthood, based on calculation of what kind of person it is most probably going to be safe to be bonded to.
To the future directed, the way bonds are formed, the meaning and content, is best kept hidden. It is a kind of pornography. The money and future directed are commonly both puritanical, with regard to public expression, and perverse, pornographic, intoxicated in private life.
Desire is knowing by experience what is good and wanting more of it.
Desire cannot be seen.
When your feeling is a bond, and pornography, you want to be independent.
You need money to make yourself independent.
Thinking only of making money, putting yourself in that relation to people based on the future, you become without desire.
You have lost your humanity.